I'm finally reaching some sense of closure with my ex-friends, I used to look at our friendship with joy and in some ways I still look at the good moments that way but I realize now the way they treated me at the end was not good and I didn't deserve to be treated the way I was. I did everything I could to go out of my way for them and I just need to find better people I guess. I've started to revisit The Division 1 and Destiny 1 and while it feels weird because those games gave me so many good memories with them I feel a sense like I can finally let go of those feelings and move on without them.
Despite all of that I have been distancing myself from people, I am just scared of being hurt lately so I kind of just not engage with anyone besides Jacob and Michael. This goes for meeting friends and a potential third for our relationship. Maybe all I need is time to feel comfortable again but right now I just don't trust anyone and these days with how crazy people act trust is hard to find.
Me and Jacob will be flying in a few days to California, we are picking up his stuff in storage and then road tripping back here. I am super excited and I will be filming the experience both for Bears On The Coast and also the music video for Perfect from my latest album "Continue". This is my first trip real vacation and trip with Jacob so I am very excited for that.
