3 Months Sober, Return to Guild Wars 2 and Dealing with Self Doubt

About six days ago was my third month being sober, it feels weird honestly. Like I recognize this is how I used to be but its feel strange and I am just not used to it. Its almost overwhelming to be honest, like theirs moments where I can't handle being with me but I push through it or I climb in to bed and just let it ride its course. But I am proud of making to 3 months at this point.

I've started to play Guild Wars 2 again, that was my first MMORPG so it holds a close place in my heart and it feels like going back home, the game still holds up to this day. Its really good, I wish the game could be played with controller. That is my only criticism of the game, now if only I can find some people to play with.

Other than that everything here has been kind of a blur, I've taken some time off from promoting my music because I feel very overwhelmed by the response to it. Also I feel a lot of self doubt about my work so I am just trying to not listen to that. I am gonna try to finish another music video for the album if I can.

This is Fine, I love Roaches crawling on my Crotch...

Been a little while since I updated, got a new computer. My old one finally died so we had to replace her, got a HP Omen 25L which has been working for the most part. Beside the blue screen of death 2 days ago its been working fantastic, I have yet to install any of music software on it and it will probably be some time till I install it. Thinking about getting a laptop just for my music creation at this point so I can take it with me wherever I go and maybe I can do live shows with it being portable. Anyways that will be a ways off.

Last night was the final straw for me, to say I have been stressed out the last few months barely does it justice and the thing I have been stressed about is the amount of Palmetto Bugs we have seen in the apartment. We have seen between one to three a day in the apartment and its just been increasing, and last night it boiled over for me when one crawled up on to the bed, under the blanket and then crawled my leg while I was sleeping. I am extremely scared and phobic of those fucking bugs and this was the last fucking straw for me. Michael says he wants to get someone to come and treat the apartment to keep them out, I think its a bigger problem then that. I honestly believe the apartment building is infested and I wish the people who owned the apartment gave a bigger shit but it seems they don't. They act like the dog in the burning room "This is fine". Its not for me and I refuse to live like this. No one should have to.

So lets hope that gets resolved soon, I need to start promoting Continue again but been unable to do that between the Roach Motel being at full capacity and that stressing me the fuck out and also setting up the new computer.